Charles DeVeaux

Social Theorist | Cultural Creative

Writing, producing, and facilitating works & conversations about love, modernity, and humanity.

9 Steps to Remarkable Success in Love - Part 1

I recently read an article about "success," written by Jeff Haden, Inc.com.  Don't get wrapped around that word just yet.  I'm not about to talk money or business.  Success is like beauty, it's in the eye of the beholder, a subjective matter.  Some hear the word and think of financial success, others envision their dream careers.  Every person defines success a little differently.  And by now you know I'm all about defining things differently.  Still, certain principles of action carry across all areas of life.  Welcome to the world of physical laws.

The same principles that create success in your favorite hobby or your career are similar to what I share on LoveRules.  Although some of my readers might think LoverRules is purely about romantic love, it's fundamentally about Love, at large.  Universal Love.  Love, the attractive force.  Let me ask you a question:

 

If you were able to have a life surrounded by the things you are most attracted to, would you consider that success?

 

For most, the answer is yes. Here is the article from Inc.com about success principles.  It's called 9 Beliefs of Remarkably Successful People.  Read it and come right back, it's quick.  No wait, read it later.  ;)

At first, I didn't like the title of that article, but actually it's good.  It inspired me to write a parallel LoveRules piece because two important questions are asked:

  1. What kind of life do you want... a remarkable one?
  2. It also asks you to consider what makes things remarkable... the strength of your beliefs.  What are your beliefs?

I find the limitations of a person's beliefs are a major obstacle to having Love in one's life, the way they want.  That's because we're conditioned to think it's a notion reserved for fantasy.  Yet, we want it in all its fairytale glory.  So as Lauren (my wife) says, how do we get over the fairy tales and just get the dream?

How would LoveRules reinterpret these same "9 Belief success" steps to create Love in your life? Let me go step by step:

  1. Time - First, establish honestly with yourself what you want, then commit to aligning yourself to those ideals in your off hours.  This is personal work, self-development. Are you for real?
  2. People - Tired of the party people and one night standers? Stop going to clubs.  Want someone who is focused on their career?  Spend less time with your gaming buddies and join a meet-up for professionals instead.  Like my friend Bassam Tarazi likes to say, "You'll lose friends along the way."  See Lesson # 18.

I'll stop there for now.  Thanks for reading.  Stay tuned Part 2 of this installment, coming shortly.